Okay, fine. I know what you’re thinking…It’s Thanksgiving time and I should not be doing a post about Levi Johnston’s “johnson”! Hey, we’ll do anything to embarrass Sarah Palin here, so it just makes sense to talk about his ‘johnson’ at this time!
I hope Sarah Palin gets caught with a copy of Playgirl in her book tour bus. *fingers crossed* It will just be one more moment of hypocrisy we can talk about!
As of right now, no one knows how big or small Levi’s ‘johnson’ is because, well, in his Playgirl spread he’s covering it up (hat tip to a reader who sent the link to these pics). But don’t worry! We do know what Carrie Prejean’s nipple most likely looks like if we use our imagination and we do know she can sing very loudly when pleasuring herself, but what I don’t understand is why she said this: “Americans heard only bits and pieces of what really happened…I think that there is a liberal bias in the media, and it’s unfortunate that conservative women are attacked for their beliefs. It’s unacceptable and it shouldn’t happen. So many Americans are frustrated. So many Americans believe that their beliefs are under attack, and they should be silent and free speech doesn’t exist.”.
(Say wha? It’s our fault she has sucky morals and continues to make stupid sexual mistakes all by herself? What does Carrie believe in again? Oh that’s right! Hating the gays, posing nude, lying and deceiving to cover her ass, acting like the victim, and masturbating alone in her basement for her boyfriend (she was fine with Sean Hannity asking her about playing with herself in front of a camera she set up….oh but when Larry King asked her why her suit against the pageant was dropped ole Carrie didn’t want to talk about it! She only talks to greasy slimeballs apparently)! But I thought conservative men and women don’t do anything sexual until they’re married? I thought they ’side hugged’ because they’re so much better than the rest of us and have the highest morals ever recorded in human history? Huh.)
Anyway, Levi will be teasing us with his penis now. We will have to use our imaginations people! I’m thinking Levi is way bigger than Todd Palin, and well, Sarah could get easily distracted on her book tour if you know what I mean….
Spits of rage…