I think Mike Hein of Maine’s Christian Civic League is confused

Posted on | November 13, 2009 | 5 Comments

My, my, my….for a guy who believes he is the final word on what is “normal” in our society, he sure does have a lot to answer to!

First off, I have never received an email through any of my email accounts from Mike Hein of the Christian Civic League of Maine until AFTER Maine’s historic election on November 3, 2009. After this election (when Question 1–same sex marriage–was repealed by Mike and his California Mormon Haters), I’ve suddenly been receiving emails from him through my White Noise Insanity email account (which he most likely got by visiting my blog). Now why is that? Oh that’s right! Because Mike Hein wants me to feel bad about some on the Yes On Hate campaign members in getting death threats, but he’s perfectly satisfied with putting me on his email list to harrass me and to rub it in that Hate/Division/Bigotry/Strife IS God’s Intention! See?

Mike Hein is a hateful cocksucker. I say ‘cock’ because Mike entered himself in a book contest this summer for a book called, “Year of the Cock” and I just figured he’s using this year to spread hate towards anyone who isn’t a pencil neck bastard straight from Satan’s goat womb as he is!

Mike Hein said… 64

Wow, the summary of this novel hits so close to home (it’s quite literally what my soon to be ex-wife has done to me within the last year) that it makes me physically sick to my stomach.

Ugh.

Please enter me in the giveaway anyway…

twofistedmanofgod[at]gmail[dot]com

+ follower

+ following on facebook

+ following on twitter (if that matters)

+ found out about it via Luxury Reader e-mail

Mike apparently wanted this book because HE WAS DIVORCING HIS WIFE OVER THE SUMMER OF 2009 (sanctity of marriage my ass!) and he seemed to connect with the male character of the book, you know, the guy who decided to do this (emphasis is mine)…

And just like that – after ten years in a committed relationship – Alan decides to walk out on his wife to pursue his fantasy of becoming a hardcore bachelor. Explaining very little, thinking even less, he dives into his exhilarating new single existence – buying a vintage Porsche, moving into a tastefully decorated bachelor pad, ignoring his wife, and bedding as many chicks as possible. However, to Alan’s surprise and dismay, becoming a single dude also unleashes in him a torrent of crippling insecurities that he didn’t even know he had. And soon, his would-be swingin’ bachelorhood is cut short – very short – by a strange and shameful obsession that drives him to utter madness.

Yep! Ole Mike could relate to bedding as many chicks as possible because this is what good Christian men do, see? And what is the obsession the main character has that almost drives him to insanity? HIS COCK SIZE. Well, from what I’ve witnessed from Mike Hein through my email account and his attitude over the years: HIS HATRED OF GAYS AND NOW BEING OBSESSED WITH A BOOK ON COCK OBSESSION LEADS ME TO BELIEVE HE’S HIDING SOMETHING FROM ALL OF US! Men with small penises try to be more powerful in other ways…you know….by going after the “bad” gays to make themselves feel better. Sometimes they buy a muscle car to make up for what they’re lacking between their legs, but then again, there are some men with big huge fat cocks who have nothing between their ears and believe they are “normal” and say gay men are not!

SIDEBAR NOTE: And it’s sad Mike Hein was beat across the finish line by a woman in a half-marathon race in Augusta this past summer. Just saying…

See the dilemma I’m having with Mike at the moment? I’m very confused! Let’s see here…

I wonder if his cock moved? Anyway…

By the way, Mike and his cock would like for all the Evangelical Haters to go to the 99 Restaurant in Augusta, Maine this Sunday to protest Cony High School’s “Awareness Day” (put on by the Civil Rights Team), because being aware of one’s self is something Mike Hein doesn’t think anyone but him should be participating in! See? From his latest email to me (emphasis mine):

This is the same school civil rights team that hosted a transgendered female two years ago (see http://mainefamilypolicycouncil.com/artman/publish/Maine_3/Cony_Teaches_Transgendering.shtml). The League contacted the Augusta restaurant’s manager, Ken Stinchfield of Carmel, Maine (stinch1234@yahoo.com and 848-3045), and its corporate officers Brad Schiff (Executive Vice President) at bschiff@99restaurants.com, Jim Kiley (Regional Director) at JKiley@99restaurants.com, and Michelle Dean (Operations Manager) at Mdean@99restaurants.com, to encourage them to reconsider hosting this event, but they’ve all apparently decided a homosexual youth group fundraiser is an appropriate event for their “family-friendly” restaurant.

[emit]

I would encourage all of you to reach out by email and phone to the parties involved (contact information at the news article and below) and to politely, but firmly, express your concern and reservations with this event.  Additionally, please consider yourself invited to attend the fundraiser on Sunday morning and to evangelize to those in attendance about the danger of homosexual activity for minor schoolchildren and to explain the saving salvation message that Christ offers them.  They need to know that they can choose to come out of the homosexual lifestyle by accepting Christ as their Lord and Savior.

I wonder of Mike Hein has health insurance? He shouldn’t….because Christ the Lord Savior will save him from himself! See? Mike apparently believes homosexuals, transgendered, bisexuals, and men with little pencil dicks can be changed just by bringing the Lord Jesus into their life and hearts! Again, anyone know if his cock moved reading this post?

By the way…

…why does Mike Hein use the name “two fisted man of god” for his email address (and on his Twitter account)? Is he trying to tell us something about his manhood (some guys will clench their fist & forearm to pretend to show their cock hardness)? His obsession maybe? Or maybe he’s a Satanic freak who has two “fists” between his leg? Hey, there are some bad goats in the bible and they might just have two cocks! I don’t know really. I’m an Atheist. I think Mike Hein might be a lesbian, though. Again, I honestly don’t know. I just know what I observe!

[END RANT]

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